Luckystott

2004-05-06 - 3:12 p.m.

So all those medical appointments I made in April? Done! I am pleased to report that Dreamy Dentist found no cavities. He cleaned my teeth, looked at my x-rays, patted me on the rear and sent me on my way with a new toothbrush. Okay, he didn�t really pat me on my rear.

Also? I am the proud owner of brand new Naughty Libriarian Glasses! Remember how I wrote that I would totally wear my glasses more if only they didn�t feel so heavy on my face? Well, my mom read that entry and said she�d buy me some seriously tricked out glasses for my birthday if I promised to wear them. So I went to the eye doctor and had my vision retested (�this one?�..oooooooooooooor this one?�). The doctor said that my prescription changed slightly, but probably not �for reals� since I am really bad at taking eye tests (�Um�I don�t know�the first one? Wait, no, the second one? Sigh. Can I see the first one again?�). My old glasses were probably slightly off all along. So now, six hundred bucks later, I have feather-weight, glare-protected, scratch-proof peepers. It�s 3pm right now � I have been wearing these glasses since 7am. No headache! Woo!

For the final piece of my medical triumvirate, I took the day off work yesterday to see my �doctor� doctor for a basic check up. I have to clear my entire day for that one. She�s a very nice lady, but she has a tendency to take really sick people before un-sick people. (I supposed I would be in favor of that policy�but I have never actually been sick enough to go see the doctor about it since I was in high school. I come from the Momma Stott School of Suck It Up.)

Anyway, at the last check up, I waited two and a half hours in the waiting room. I finally ran downstairs to buy a granola bar at the corner deli. Apparently my name was called while I was out. When I came back (like, seriously, TWO minutes later), the receptionist yelled at me for keeping the doctor waiting. Now, those of you who know me very well know that I am completely wonky when I�m hungry. Don�t you know that I thrust my hand at the receptionist and proclaimed most righteously, �I kept HER waiting? Look. At. My. Hand. It�s shaking because I haven�t eaten for six hours. Surely, my FAINTING - and probably HITTING MY HEAD on a stirrup as I go down - would REALLY put her behind schedule�DON�T YOU THINK?!� Oh yes. I did say that. I am so charming when I am defensive.

Yesterday morning, I prepared myself. I joined a Bible study three months ago, see, so now I'm all about being Christ-like in trying situations. (bwah!) I packed my knapsack with a few snacks, a bottle of water and plenty of reading material. Wouldn�t you know that the doctor took my appointment right away and I was in and out of there like nobody�s bizness? How does one make sense of that?! I suspect the receptionist wrote "DIVA" on the front of my medical records. Hey, whatever works.

All this reminded me of another doctor�s visit wherein I forgot to engage my edit button. About six years ago, I finished two contracts in a row � a tour and a cruise ship. I hadn�t seen the doctor in two years, so it made sense to check in. As the nurse was taking my vitals, my doctor walked by with some files in her hand and recognized me.

�Oh, hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii! How�s the acting career?� she cooed.

�Great. I finished the tour and right away booked a job working as a dancer on a cruise ship. It�s been so much fun!� I chirped back.

�Terrific. Can�t wait to hear about it. Be right back!�

She went off to finished up her business and the nurse continued with the vitals. Now, it has to be said, she wasn�t a very pleasant nurse. She was very short and stout and frowny, frowny, frowny. You know, one of those people that just love being grouchy and put-upon? Well -- tut, tut, looks like rain -- I guess I rubbed her the wrong way. When I got on the scale, she looked at my chart and knifed, �Oh, you dance on a cruise ship? Hmm. You�ve gained four pounds.�

I was momentarily stunned by her audacity. But you KNOW a snarky comeback is never far from my lips...and I wasn't in no Bible study back then neither. I affected my most cheerfully innocent voice and replied, �Huh. I guess it�s true. Muscle really does weigh more than FAT.� And on that �fat� -- I very pointedly did a quick once over of her zaftig body for full effect.

Yeah. I have a tendency to dig back like that. It's not very Christian of me. But PLEASE. I�m not wired to take that kind of crap. You give me a whoppin� dollop of Passive Aggressive and I will dish it right back. I know. It's my cross to bear.

Reading: �Time Out New York� magazine. Trying to mark it all up for my mom�s friend�who will be visiting NYC this summer and wants to know what's "in".

Watching: �The Bachelor� -- Lord Almighty, it doesn�t even have to be GOOD and it sucks me in! How is it possible that Trish went from being the biggest tramp to the most remarkable personality on the show? Really. Now there�s those three evil little Sorority Barbies left and they all�ech.

Singing: every Phil Collins, Rod Stewart, and Sting song I can think of -- I'm helping Steven find his ultimate pop song for auditions. Here�s me: �What about Easy Lover�? Steven�s all �Huh?� and then I ebulliently launch into performance: (singing) �She�s an eaaaaasy loooooo-vah! She�ll get a hold on you belieeeeeeeeve it!�

Oh, and did you know that Sussudio was the name of Phil Collin�s daughter�s HORSE ? Thank God there are people on the internet that know these things. The first time I heard that song, I said to my little 5th grade self, "Su...what? Where does he get this stuff?"

____________________________________________________

last entry next entry

Supergirl Central:

The Latest:

The Archives:

The Links:

"Heeeeey, you!"

Behind the scenes:

design � cece
dafont for aquiline
explodingdog
hosted by diaryland